Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (A Second Opinion)

Dear Christ!  I just got back from the cinema and I’m numb.  I won’t go into depth about Transformers 2 as TheDVS has already discussed the details earlier this week so this should really only be read after his review and is only included as a very slightly different opnion on the film than what he offers.

Ever been around someone that is so full on and full of life that they exhaust you?  That’s Transformers 2.  Somehow simultaneously very exciting and thoroughly boring this is Michael Bay by numbers.

Bordering on racist and sexist yet show casing the kind of action and CGI quality that you won’t see any where else, Transformers is neither quite as bad as I expected yet, and I really can’t stress this enough, still absolutely dreadful.  Where Terminator 4 was a poor but watchable movie, Transformers 2 is a poor movie dragged out to an excruciating two and a half hours long.  Trimming a full hour off would certainly have helped the film and I think even allow it to gain the 3 out of 5 score I gave the original (a mark I still stand by though I personally now find the film unwatchable).

However as it is Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen still suffers from the same problems the first film had (the film makers seem confused as to whether this is a farce aimed at 8 year olds or an action flick for grown ups) with an almost pornographic camera approach to the shot choices of how to film the women and vehicles.  Again, though the direction seems to have come from the ‘Dummy’s Guide to How to Shoot a TV Commercial’ book the real problem is in the writing.  A plot so appalling the exposition has to keep repeating what’s going on through out and characters so two dimensional they make the cartoon original, pre 1986 movie, show seem like an episode of The Wire.

However I can’t help but wonder how anyone could really expect more from a Michael Bay movie.  It’s loud, stupid and sexy and you’re all equally to blame as myself for paying to see it.

2 ‘As Long as a David Lean Epic but with the depth of Itchy and Scratchy cartoons’ out of 5

5 Responses to “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (A Second Opinion)”

  1. GW Paperstacks Says:

    Where de white robots at?

  2. I would like to punch Mr Bay in the scrotum for that pile of shite he has unleashed on earth.

    Thank you.

  3. The DvS Says:

    I see no interactive explosions in this review.

  4. The DvS Says:

    Sorry, “accompanying piece”.

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