Archive for January, 2010

ARE YOU A SHARK OR A SHEEP?

Posted in Previews, The Guest Spot, The Saviour of Blammo on January 29, 2010 by GW Paperstacks

The point is, ladies and gentlemen, that greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right, greed works. Greed clarifies, cuts through, and captures the essence of evolutionary spirit. Greed, in all it’s forms; greed for life, for money, for love, knowledge has marked an upward surge for mankind. And greed, you mark my words, will not only save Teldar Paper, but that other malfunctioning corporation called the USA.

Interesting fact, when I go to acting auditions I use the Gordon Gekko address to Teldar Paper to show off my great delivery and passion for acting. I am excited more than most people then (apparently more than everyone as I’ve not even heard a new Wall Street was in the offering) at the prospect of another giant speech from recovering  sex addict (and Welsh woman botherer) Michael Douglas to rant out at an unimpressed table of casting people who were looking for “someone less like you”.

Let hope this movie can kick start the economy, and not only save Oliver Stones recent run of poor form, but also my acting career and that other malfunctioning corporation THE USA! (and scene).

I have been watching….

Posted in Reviews with tags , , , , , , , on January 28, 2010 by The DvS

It’s my little “we’re still alive” update to the masses as no doubt, someone out there has missed us. Yeah, just you. Thanks. Anyway, D, what have you been watching? Sit down, I’ll tell you!

PONTYPOOL

Zombies! Again! Only we don’t see any at all, so you can breathe a sigh of relief somewhat. Being a zombie itself is possibly a bit contrived. I’d say more cannibal. The basis of Pontypool is to combine a “zombie outbreak” with the magical power of the airwaves, setting up the atmosphere with suggestion and sounds, rather than images of guts and gore the most diehard would want. It’s an interesting spin, and one that definitely works for me. Confined to a small town radio station in Canada, our shock-jock lead character,  played by Stephen McHattie, has been adapting from the big city station which he thrived in to satisfy the listeners he’s looking down upon. Through his uncaring manner, we learn as his show is on air, that reports of gangs of deranged people are attacking townsfolk and eating them. Cue up the big shits! So, himself and his production team are locked down in the studio, discovering the cause of what’s driving these people to turn insane. All the while, listening in to the reports coming in of more incidents as they happen.

This is where I’ll shut my mouth now, because it becomes rather revealing, and is integral to the story. If you want to know more, you’re on the internet now and go spoil it for yourself! To summarise, Pontypool is an interesting addition to the genre, which has it’s own unique fare to make it stand out above others. It’s a refreshing idea and executes it’s powers of suggestion well enough. Watch.

Pontypool gets 4 egotistical DJ jingles out of 5

What else, man? Divulge some more, as my voice is louder than yours and listen ye shall…

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More Zombies!

Posted in Small Screen Blammo with tags , , on January 21, 2010 by The DvS

Yes, just what the world needs. More fucking zombies to pour on top of an already-overflowing bath of the undead. For example, today I noticed in a shop, today’s new releases featured a title called War Zombies Versus Something Irrelevant & Pointless. I may have exaggerated somewhat on this title, but it had military zombies in it, I shit you not!

Thankfully, at least commissioned for a pilot on American station AMC, is The Walking Dead, the long running comic created by Robert Kirkman and Tony Moore on Image Comics. Those that know me are pretty fed up of how amazing I find this series, and secretly wish to touch me in a platonic way as a way of thanks for recommending it to them as they’ve gone on to check it out themselves and loved every page they’ve read. Yet, there’s no denying that one of the most intelligent comics to be released in years is deserving of the show format. The story relies more on it’s characters, than it’s undead threat. Survival is a necessity, and how they obtain it whilst retaining morals and sanity is what I’d watch on a daily basis with no questions asked.

Frank Darabont‘s at the helm, as he’s another person who, according to reports, “gets it“. One can only hope so. The big wonder is how some of the series’ more graphic scenes (and I assure you, if you’ve not read it, they’re…graphic…) will be handled on television. Ah screw it, no it’s not a worry at all. Get this damn pilot going already, pick it up, entertain me, and don’t you ever dare cancel it. And don’t let Jay Leno on it either.

Cop Out

Posted in News, Trailers with tags , , , on January 19, 2010 by The DvS

Hey look, it’s A Couple Of Dicks! Not according to those evil censory, virginal types, who slammed down their almighty gavel of pure judgment down upon the earth, and forced a name change to Cop Out. At the helm is Kevin Smith, and it stars Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan as…cops! Here’s some blurb:

Two longtime NYPD partners on the trail of a stolen, rare, mint-condition baseball card find themselves up against a merciless, memorabilia-obsessed gangster. Jimmy (Bruce Willis) is the veteran detective whose missing collectible is his only hope to pay for his daughter’s upcoming wedding, and Paul (Tracy Morgan) is his “partner-against-crime” whose preoccupation with his wife’s alleged infidelity makes it hard for him to keep his eye on the ball.

Guess you’ll be wanting a trailer of sorts? You lucky people.

Opinions if you will!

Spider Man, No More

Posted in News with tags , , , , , on January 11, 2010 by The DvS

Breaking news here, as it’s reported Sony Pictures have just shelved all plans for the fourth instalment of the Spider Man franchise. So that’s it. No more Sam Raimi as he believes he won’t deliver quality by the film’s proposed release date of 2011, nor is there a decent script to commit to. Without Raimi then, you get Tobey Maguire‘s departure announced too.  Without Maguire, there’s no Kirsten Dunst. Recent rumblings of John Malkovich playing the Vulture have now well and truly been pissed on. Of course, this leads Raimi to possibly start the whip cracking on that World Of Warcraft movie we’ve heard about, or something else that was a bit like Drag Me To Hell.

Indeed. Now Sony announced this on their Twitter page, which is miles better and quicker than giving an elongated statement to feed news blogs everywhere. It also takes less time to break the internet. One hundred and forty characters can just about kill a lot of people, as it may have done right about now. Through this, you notice that Sony also stated Peter Parker goes back to high school in 2012. Hey, look, it’s franchise reboot time! All fingers so far (in my eyes) are pointing in the direction of a spin on Ultimate Spider Man, and someone whose name sounds like Back Jethron is a “fine example” of a Peter Parker. Whatever that means. Anyway, internet, speculate!  Is this right? Do we need more Spider Man? Should they just let Disney do it? Who should star? Who should direct? Shall Blammo have a stab at Spidey? Please…please…I’ve wanted to write Mysterio for years…and I’ll give it to Bruce Campbell anyday.

Big Fan (clever titles go to hell 2010)

Posted in Reviews, The Guest Spot, The Saviour of Blammo with tags , , , , , on January 6, 2010 by GW Paperstacks

I’m a Patton Oswalt fan and have been for a long time.  I’ve watched his career slowly rise and fall from from his stand-up days to his many sit-com appearances to his biggest gig to date playing a cartoon rat in the totally under-rated ‘Ratatouille’.

Big Fan‘ see’s Patton in a starring role for a change and whilst he’s been totally typecast as the sad loser type I’m happy to say he (along with a supporting cast that if I were to cast a low budget movie would all be in said movie) does a pretty good job!

Patton plays “Paul from Staten Island”, a thirty five year old life long ‘New York Giants’ fan who is stuck in a dead end job.  He’s also a regular caller on talk radio shows and a chronic masturbater who lives at home with his mum… its not at all like my life as I have never phoned a talk radio station. (Lies. Ed.)

One day whilst out eating some pizza with his best buddy Sal (played by Kevin Corrigan who is one of my favourite supporting actors in indie movies ever!) they spot Quantro Bishop,  a New York Giants linebacker and their favourite all time player.  After following Quantro around a bit Paul finally gets to meet his hero and gets soundly fucked up for following him around.

Paul is now stuck in a bad situation getting worse – on the one hand his favourite player is about to go to jail and his beloved New York Giants are losing, on the other hand he’s being pressured to press charges and claim compensation to save his dreary life whilst being attacked on talk radio by a fellow known only as “Philadelphia Phil” (voiced by Michael Rappaport who is one of my favourite supporting actors in indie movies ever!).

Big Fan is a flawed diamond that has found itself a groove in the ‘dark comedy‘ genre. It’s probably quite rightly being compared to the brilliant “The Wrestler”, not only because it’s directed by the screenwriter of ‘The Wrestler’ but because it stays very much in the same mood.  Where ‘The Wrestler’ succeeds and ‘Big Fan’ stumbles, however, is in wrapping up all the loose ends (i.e. whilst ‘The Wrestler’ managed to do so whilst leaving the final answer unanswered, ‘Big Fan’ leaves you with many loose threads).

You can however take heart in the fact that nobody else has ever used the threads before and that Big Fan is pretty much an original concept. I very much expect a British football based remake sooner rather than later, Danny Dyer and Vinnie Jones attached (one of your favourite supporting actors in indie movies ever?! Ed.).

The DvS, five movies he liked from 00-09, and some silly comments afterwards

Posted in A Retrosepctive, Reviews with tags , , , , , , on January 6, 2010 by The DvS

It’s quite hard making these lists when you think about it. Considering how many films come out a year, and then sifting through a decade’s worth of our circle enjoying about three a year, that left me with thirty films to choose from, because I’m so good at maths. So I’m not picking outrageously epic and predictable choices, I’m just picking out the titles that I really enjoyed over the years. Except one, because it’s an outrageously epic and predictable choice. Onward!

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