Hey! Things happened and where were you? At a bar, I bet

Or as we like to call it in the world of meandering ramble that is “blogging”, it’s a newsround. Is it me or did espionage get really tough these days?

First up…a tricky decision.

Zack Snyder, what are you doing here? You throw out a trailer for your new movie, Sucker Punch, with six posters of your female leads to plug it. Choosing one to grace Blammo was tough and I hope you understand how hard it was. The choice now, not my peni….I don’t know what your movie is about exactly, but you got a anime/Matrix/Dragonheart/samurai/Sky Captain/cheesecake blend going on here. It makes zero sense whatsoever and I WANT TO WATCH IT. I don’t know what’s in your coffee, son, but you need to start sharing the love.

Jokes aside now, it’s been decided that the UK Film Council is to be abolished in a new cost cutting measure by the Culture Secretary, Jeremy Hunt. Now if you have a career in this British industry, you’d know that Mr Hunt’s name has been referenced with plenty of rhyming slang this week, and you really hate this government. Rightly so. A governing body for films has thrived for the past decade to make an industry generate a profit for this country, despite claims of “CEO’s having lavish £2.5 million lunch breaks” and quotes of the industry being a “luxurious, subsidised hobby for luvvies”. I don’t know what our governments, past and present, have against industries pumping revenue back into the country, but surely despite how bad our times have been amongst recession, we all like to kick back and forget our worries with some entertainment? What’s worse is that it’s been said UK films will still get the funding from the Lottery, but there’s no say so as to how, or who is even replacing the Council, thus removing the guarantee and casting a massive shadow of doubt to people’s futures. So without this going onto a political tirade as to why it’s everything’s gone all Sex Pistols, you can get you ass over and sign the petition to save the Council, by clicking this link here. No harm in trying, worked for 6Music.

As much as I’d have liked to have seen Darren Aronofsky‘s vision of Robocop, I’m actually relieved that the remake has been officially canned now. Part of the Great MGM Debacle, this is another casualty amongst the twenty third Bond movie and The Hobbit, which has been doomed since day one. You ever get the feeling some things just aren’t meant to be?

Sam Worthington. He’s a lucky bugger isn’t he? Getting involved in major blockbusters, almost out of thin air. Granted they didn’t do very well (Hello Clash Of No Titans, Terminator: Looked Good On Blu Ray and Avatarverymuchforaquickreleasedvdandblurayset asthecinemaexperiencewouldhavekilledme) in my eyes, yet someone’s gone and decided he’d make a terrific Dan Dare. Don’t see it myself. No. I really don’t. And get this! Karl Urban, for he’s so urban, might be Judge Dredd. Okay. What demented tombola are we picking these names from?

On top of the Avengers news a few days back, it should be noted that Mark Ruffalo (he’s so buffalo?) has clinched the Hulk/Banner crown from Ed Norton. My ignorance says I’ve not seen Ruffalo in anything that I can remember, or is noteworthy. If I have, then I was completely drunk and it means nothing. Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye though….well done there….

Speaking of comic related things, it’s not a movie as such but it plays out like one we should really deserve. It’s the trailer for the DC Universe Online game, due to be released later in the year and revel at Mark Hamill as the Joker. Again.

Machete red-band trailer, anyone? Not you, little one, this is so NSFW! Oh you’re 43. Sorry. Contains boobs, violence and very flexible intestine.

The new Green Lantern posters have been released, and they look pretty as a whole. On their own they just don’t work, sadly. But, my inner nerd says that Mark Strong is going to make a damn good Sinestro. Check all the Lantern posters combined with those lovely chaps at Geek Syndicate.

One of the strangest things I’ve heard this week is that there’s going to be another Crow movie, written by Nick Cave. Make of that what you will.

And now. Sheer terror.

Scared? Yes. Back to Sucker Punch….

(Also thanks to GW Paperstacks for our spiffy new 3D logo. As a reward, I know he likes girls drinks, and he’ll get a Malibu and WKD ensemble)

3 Responses to “Hey! Things happened and where were you? At a bar, I bet”

  1. GW Paperstacks Says:

    Machete looks awesome, you picked the worst of the posters for Suckerpunch. Good day sir.

  2. I thought Rocket or Babydoll too. Oh god, back to “studying”.

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