R.I.P. Blake Edwards

Being thrown out of this place is significantly better than being thrown out of a leper colony.

The Assassination of Yogi Bear

Thor Blimey (again)

If I got to be honest, this trailer for Thor poses more interest than that elongated Comic Con leak a few months back. Now I’m rather keen to see it, where as before I was rather in two minds whether I should take a toilet during Hopkins hamming up Odin. Watch, people.

Thor Blimey (again), posted with vodpod

 

Transformers: Nothing like Pink Floyd. Shush.

Dark Of The Moon? Really? That’s the best you could come up with? Sounds tragic on name alone.

Nevertheless, Michael Bay is back with his take on big robots who seem really crap at hiding. The third instalment of Transformers is on the way, and Blammo don’t half love a bit of robot on robot action. Well, personal opinon differs amongst us all, but even though Megan Fox has departed (SHAME, no really I’m serious, I love her. LOVE. A LA STALK), we still have those lovely little clunk click noises to look forward to!

We needn’t analyse anything here. There’s a situation involving the first men on the moon (not HG Wells folks. Sorry, run along…) and it’s clearly been covered up that they run into a Decepticon ship on the moon and potentially awake something that’s probably not going to do very well on the toy stakes unless it’s really cool in the movie. Don’t you hate that? Your big bad in your film is £3.97 in Toys R Us within four weeks of release? BOOOOO.

Tease us then. I enjoyed them clunks and clicks.

R.I.P. Irvin Kershner

So soon as one leaves us, another one goes…

Irvin Kershner, director of The Empire Strikes Back, Never Say Never Again and my favourite, Robocop 2. Rest in peace.

R.I.P. Leslie Nielsen

It’s a topsy-turvy world, and maybe the problems of two people don’t amount to a hill of beans. But this is our hill. And these are our beans!

Monsters: Lost in Transmutation

There is a long held opinion around the watercooler at the Blammo offices and it’s one of the few things we all agree on, Monster movies should deal with the struggle of a few people instead of tackling the big picture.

The average armchair viewer can’t feel empathy towards the military man who single-handedly destroys the alien threat, but they can draw some parallels with their own lifestyle if the hero of a monster movie is a fat bloke who’s trying to save himself. Cloverfield was a fine example of this theory in action. YES! A monster was attacking New York, but what the fuck were a bunch of rich kids from Brooklyn going to do about it? Nothing! Instead of following a story about how a space alien was delt with by the military we had a movie about how a bunch of friends saved a really hot girl and attempted to get evacuated like everyone else.

I want my eyes to bleed again…

I was just flicking through the internet, as you do, and stumbled across the sheer horror that I only managed to see once as a child, is being released on DVD for the first time in the UK. Yes, the kingdom united, December the 13th is a day to remember. It’s a day where you will remember my harsh warning when you walk into your local DVD emporium and see the (possibly overpriced) offending item on the shelf. I’m talking about the indescribable events that take place within the world of The Garbage Pail Kids.

The year is 1987. We’re all young little scamps, running around pretending we’re Street Hawks, Airwolves and Knight Riders (even the girls were at it), being tortured by our parent’s dodgy tastes in music when they were drunk (something about Disco Sheep haunts me to this day), and sorting through our collections of Garbage Pail Kids trading cards. How we loved them! A complete gross out parody of the cutesy Cabbage Patch Kids, there’s nothing we enjoyed more than taking our 375+ collection of cards with an overpowering essence of crappy chewing gum into the school yards and impressing others with our Eerie Ernie’s or our Adam Bomb’s.  Then we also discovered you get that essence on your clothes, you will reek all month no matter how hard you wash.

So, again, we go back to the days of how great the video shops were. Being at the age where what you’re collecting is suddenly a movie you had no idea was happening, and there it was right before your very eyes, it instantly demands your attention. Not necessarily your respect because you’re only ten or eleven years old, and making a Blammo is a long way off yet. Yet look, it’s trailer time! imagine this on the front end of your rented video of American Rabbit.

We’re all agreed then that looked bollocks? Great! Then please join me on December the 13th, for I’m going to resurrect the Bleeding Eyes segment, as this cannot be ignored. Windy Winston and Ali Gator are going to be nothing else but HILARIOUS. They were back then, because we really didn’t know better. Maybe that was the best state of mind to employ…

We should all watch more Indian movies….

…or not, as this scene from Maghadeera lays waste to anything Hollywood has produced in years. Unrelenting action abound, you’ll be on your edge of your seat for the ultimate 90 second ride.

We should all watch more Indian movies…., posted with vodpod

R.I.P. Ingrid Pitt

A man who has come here as a fool!